A Year In Review: Spiraling

“Part of our character is defined by how we treat people when we have nothing versus when we have everything. Humility is a virtue.” #StuffRareSays

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“The thing about living in a small town is: There is a serious lack of opportunity.”

On the last week of protests, I happened to be in the right place at the right time, and landed myself a job.

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As a server none the less, but I am definitely grateful to have gotten the opportunity during such trying times financially.

I also stayed politically involved for the rest of the summer.
Hey…
Mid Term elections were a big deal this year.

All the while, keeping up as your daily blogger.

Doing that mom thing.

Ummm. LIFE!
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OK wait!

Just because I mention politics, does not mean I’m pushing them on you. I’m perfectly content talking REAL life stuff any day.
AND
I do NOT and WILL NOT judge you by whatevs because NONE OF THOSE LABELS MAKE YOU WHO YOU ARE. That’s all on you.

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…..

As the summer progressed into fall, things at work got more…
Tense.

One of my bosses did me dirty, and went out of their way to stick it to me any way they could. Including character homicide.

Even though, I took it all with a grain of salt.
You know… the mission.
It got tough but I really needed to keep the job which meant
(Excuse my language)
I had to eat shit for a while.

“There is a fine line held within the position of power. The differencce being Abuse of power versus true leadership” #StuffRareSays

With everything that I was putting energy into, from the community effort, the job, the mom life, you name it. I wore it.

AND

I doing my thing.

I became so overwhelmed that I started telling myself
“Something needs to be removed from the plate.”

Confession:
I almost put the blog on hold for a while.
BUT
Leave it To J. Danae to keep me in check.

“I’ve never known you to give up. You usually just get right back up and dust yourself off.”
Life friends…. Gotta love em’
They you for your entirety.
AND
Remind you who you are.

How could I let my gal and all of you down?
How could…
I let  ME down.

With that newfound realization that people do look up to me,
She shook me right out of my stupor and straight back into

I GOT THIS!!!
Mode

Mad luv J. Danae
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Meanwhile,

Many of you stated, “I don’t know how you do it.”

The thing is
“We all have it in us.”

Those family moments though.

“It is in those good times, when we see pure joy in our children’s eyes. That WE will ALWAYS understand why we do it.” #StuffRareSays

But then….

The argument.

Yup

Things got…

Pretty harsh

Landing me up  in….

The spiral

The strain of all these issues wore me down.

So much that I HAD to break away. I needed a hiatus and I needed one BAD.

So I dipped out of town by myself for a day and a half.
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ME TIME

Only….

That trip went sour hours in.

I STILL cannot express the utter disappointment in this trip without lacking the right words to say it.

Let’s just say, a day and a half later I resurfaced with the front of my van crunched in.
Nooooooo!

Thank you negligent drivers at the grocery stores!!!
#SarcasmAtItsFinest

A trip meant for an escape instead carried regret.

As the tensions rose at work, I started searching for another job.
Thankfully, I found a far better fit.

AND

Began the transition that just about kicked my bottom.

I didn’t even know what tired was at that point

BLOG
JOB
KIDS
JOB #2
Catching up

Sleep?
What is that even?

Stressing over fixing the van AND paying for it.
The holidays coming up
Having to spend our Christmas fund on the van.

BECAUSE

We seriously needed the reliable vehicle BEFORE winter hit.

KNOWING
Christmas was already broke AF
AND
STILL striving to make one.

BY

Picking up a second job

UNTIL

I had to let one go.

Things got so strained and I began to reel.

Because of this series of events, I began to reflect more on certain aspects in my life. Placing things, places, people,
AND
Unfinished business…..

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And so….
The next couple of weeks I laid low.
Doing my best to make sense of it all.

“Who would have thought this was merely the first wave.”

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A Year In Review: Embarking

“They’re Ruthless.”
#StuffRareSays

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Aside from our usual first week of the New Year’s blues…
(May DAD R.I.P 2014)
2018 started with a bang!!

Three weeks in and I was filing to run for Town Council.

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Do you guys remember that?!

Taking that step was a nerve-wracking experience for me. From beginning to end.

Here’s the thing: I didn’t run for the position to be a politician. I ran for the position to step up and make a difference the only way I know how.

“Lead by example.” 

An impact made.
AND
Message heard loud and clear.

After three years of observing how the meetings were conducted.
I knew something needed to be said.

Was I happy about all the exposure it gave me?

Not really.

Did the lime light scare me?
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Just a little.

I was perfectly happy being your everyday, humble neighbor layin’ low and enjoying the small things in life.

With a few remarkable traits.

One being…
Standing up for what I believe in
AND
Being hard headed enough to pursue it.

And so…..
I had to do what needed to be done, who else would have?

PLOT TWIST

I wasn’t the only one thinking this.

Several other people in my generation gap stepped up, and spoke their truths as well.

My peace: Just… Do it for the right reasons.

“There is a difference between seeking power and doing it because it’s the right thing to do.” #StuffRareSays

One thing that hurt: Losing a friend because they found out I was a “Politician”

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 If you can even call it that.

There is something about the way politicians play their little games that disgusts me beyond all reason.
SO. NOT. ME.

I took some hard hits in so many aspects.

 I learned a lot about other people, and their TRUE intentions.

YET

Thankfully, I already had the understanding that people’s assumptions of YOU carries no power over who you REALLY ARE.

Did it bother me to be underestimated? Nah…

“The thing about knowing who you are, where you came from, how it shaped you and what you bring to the table because of it is, ‘You don’t have nothing to prove to anybody.’ You are who you are. They either see it or they don’t.” #StuffRareSays

BESIDES

No one has time to tell the story of why you should like them.
Differences aren’t made by measuring.
They’re made by process.

“You need thick skin to hold a seat in office, don’t you?”
You’d be surprised at how often this naïve question gets asked.

Do I have thick skin? Plenty of it.
This one’s been getting shaped for quite some time now.

Having a youthful look: A blessing or a curse?
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“Life is different once you take a step outside your comfort zone.”

Did I step outside my comfort zone?
So far out of it, I almost landed on another plane.

OK not THAT much but it most definitely changed me.

FINALLY!!!

Even though I didn’t win, I still got through my candidacy…
Accomplished.

Will I do it again?
If that’s what it takes to make a difference for the people. I’m your gal.
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TO BE CONTINUED…….

 

Tethered

“The moment I laid my lips on yours, two hearts became ONE. Souls entertwined.” #RoofTop
#StuffRareSays

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We jumped on the moon.
Took a ride around Jupiter.
Came out the other side
Two flaming balls
That
Crashed through the sky
AND
Fell to the earth
IN
The blink of an eye.
Washing and waning.
Like the ocean tides
Coming full circle
On this crazy ride.
©Rarenwise 12-17-18
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Mother Child Bond


 

 


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I can't even believe that seven years ago today I was in a hospital giving birth to this little/big guy We almost lost him on his first day of life. The nurses snatched him away without any right. With great fear in his heart, he could not breath. Surrounded by strange woman in agony. It baffles me that between the six nurses that surrounded him, not a single one considered the large reality that a newborn needs their mothers embrace. All because he was born with the umbilical cord wrapped over his nose. Making it kinda difficult to push him out. (The Dr. Had to stop me in mid push and snip the cord in order for me to finish the deed.😂😂 Oh the strength it takes to hold a crowning head in one spot.) He was not aloud in my arms in the most crucial moment after birth. So As his life became more scarce, and this mothers cries unheard. Pleading for them to give me my child. His lack of breathing only got worse. Despite what I knew the nurses went against me, claiming they knew what was best for my near dying baby. His father and I made several attempts to get our son, but the nurses all rejected every one. It wasn't until the very moment I felt the last fearful breaths of our son who was soon to be undone. That I looked over at his dad and said, "If you don't grab our son from them NOW he is going to die!" He took me seriously and grabbed our son. the nurses tried to stop him but he stood his ground. So he proceeded to take him and bring him to me. A comforted smile now appearing on our sons face. He placed him gently on my chest and in a heart beat he was breathing great again. Healthy as ever not one issue at all. Just a simple need to feel safe is his mothers grasp. And his hunger kicked in a few seconds later 😋 "Never underestimate the bond of a mother and their child." #StuffRareSays #storytime #family #birthday #birthdayboy #photo #writersofinstagram #writerslife #lifeasweknowit

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